It’s happened to everyone who plays online. You get into that one particular lobby and you hear the most annoying, high-pitched voice you’ve ever heard in your life. Yeah, it’s that eight-year old who’s mommy bought him that M for mature game without actually considering the fact that her child might not really need it.
Being that Christmas is still fresh within the last week, there have been an increased number of these little annoyances on games as of lately. For example while playing the other day I was put into a lobby with an entire team of children who were practically eating their mics they were so close to their mouths, and they weren’t just talking, they were yelling. Wonderful. We played them three or four times, obviously kicked their little asses which is nothing to be proud of, and after each game one of them would grow increasingly more irritating. He even let out a high-pitched scream into his kinect sensors mic causing the headache of the century.
Now, I love kids don’t get me wrong. And some kids happen to be pretty damn good at video games(my nephew) HOWEVER, this is a rarity and in most cases these kids shouldn’t be playing these mature games period. Hearing a seven-year old tell me I’m an A-hole, or the lovely alternative word for a female dog is a little over the top and never ceases to catch me off guard. It’s almost hard not to let the little nuisance have an ear full back. I manage to refrain from stooping to that level, but many people aren’t so kind and end up making the situation worse.
One thing about these kids is that verbally, they will not back down. It doesn’t matter how much someone attempts to shut them down, they run that tiny mouth like it’s a cursing marathon and they refuse to lose. Even though I’ve heard this countless times it’s never any less shocking, and I’m left somewhat appalled and curious as to where little Johnny’s mother is while he’s repeatedly screaming Fudge(You know what I mean) at the top of his tiny little lungs.
It doesn’t help that the people I normally play with are the ones riling these kids up. No matter how humorous it may be at times, I still can’t bring myself to join in. Maybe it’s the motherly instinct in me where instead of laughing, I’d rather scold them and tell them to watch their mouths and stop saying “bad words”. Â But the gamer in me secretly wants their Xbox to get the red rings of death so I no longer have to feel that way. Mommy will just purchase them a new one anyway.
Regardless of everything brainless soccer moms will continue to buy their little brats these games, and sadly it’s something I’ve become quite accustom to and will have to continue to deal with. For any mom(Or dad, I didn’t forget about you either) who happens to come across this, please take into consideration you have options when purchasing your child a game. Look closely at the rating and think about whether or not your precious little booboo needs to be virtually slaughtering people, or doing a little karate with a cuddly, lovable main character while playing Kung Fu Panda. (The second one, dummy)
In the end you’ll make the wrong choice, and the rest of us have to deal with it. So, in advance, I’d like to personally thank you for all of my future annoying-child-game-related-headaches I’ll unwillingly suffer through due to your poor decision-making skills. No really, thanks. I love them.
Anyone else think there should be a font intended for sarcasm?